Library residents A.K.A. the homeless, moochers, and creeps

Anyone who has worked in a public library for more than a day can tell you about "the regulars". Let me say up front that the nice old lady who checks out books on disk for her blind husband is a good regular. The little children who come in once a week, carefully and quietly choose a book(s) are good regulars.

However, every library has bad regulars at XYZ we have the current weirdos/annoying patrons:

Homeless Lady -- who bathes and lives in her car outside the library. She was cooking her food in the library cafe microwave (which was inappropriate to say the least). Did I mention she has oozing puss encrusted lesions all over her as well? We just avoid the bathrooms that she enters. And the Computers. And the Chairs.

Computer Freeloaders -- There are a whole slew of these patrons who because they have no job/mental illnesses/nothing to do decide to sit on the computer the entire day and ask for extensions all day long.

The Gabber -- this patron has no clue that they are crossing personal boundaries by speaking to you about various non-library related topics. They think you are their bosom buddy. Your only mistake was to make eye contact once with this person. That is all it took. Now you will spend the rest of your life ducking the desk and answering fake phone calls just to get away.

The Creepy Stalker -- this patron knows way too much about your personal life, work schedule, and habits WITHOUT you telling them. Everyone gets one of these in a library eventually. I have had at least 7 in the past 3 years alone.

You might think I am exaggerating -- nope. Ask any public librarian.

I once had a male patron enter the elevator with me, proceed to get on one knee, tell me how beautiful I was, how I must make alot of money and wasn't this a great place to work. Did I mention i was 6 months pregnant at this point. Trapped in an elevator with a loon. Good times.